That’s A Wrap, Everyone! See You In January!
The Macalope regrets to inform readers that Apple has announced that there will be no more Apple announcements for the year.
After this one.
Of course, it’s just two months until Macworld, so that’s not exactly a big hardship, is it? If you can’t go for two lousy months, you might need to check yourself into a 12-step program. The rumors had Apple announcing new iMacs and Mac minis, the latter of which is feeling “not so fresh.” The refresh speculation had followed speculation the mini would be summarily dropped, which always causes a great wailing and rending of garments.
AppleInsider then learned that an Apple representative told a miffed miniphile to “be patient”, which everyone is now parsing as “GLORIOUS MINI UPDATE COMING SOON! WILL INCLUDE LASERS AND FREE PIE!”
While the horny one believes the mini will continue to be with us in some form or another, color him brown and unimpressed with this news. Was “be patient” anywhere near “your call is important to us” and “stay on the line” in this conversation?
You’re Grounded!
Sigh. MobileMe. What are we going to do with you? Personally, the Macalope doesn’t rely on your services that much because, well, they’re so unreliable.
But have you thought about what you’re going to be when you grow up? You’re never going to make it in the business world by sleeping in until 9:25 and then showing up late for work. And denying you have a problem isn’t really helping matters, young man.
OK, OK. You can walk away from the Macalope… but you can’t walk away from your problems!
With Analysts Like These Who Needs [Insert Your Own Joke Using the First Four Letters of “Analyst”]
Admittedly, the Macalope hasn’t followed any other companies to the degree that he follows Apple. But he seriously doubts they have the cadre of idiot non-savants following them around that Apple does. Every week there’s a new flight of idiocy.
Take Friedman Billings Ramsey’s Craig Berger for example. Berger said that iPhone production would fall by as much as 40% in the current quarter. Yikes! Sell, sell, sell! Andy M. Zaky, however, notes that Berger’s predictions are so much ground chuck (tip o’ the antlers to Daring Fireball).
Silicon Alley Insider’s Dan Frommer at least realizes he’s making very little hay with Steve Jobs’ increased use of his Gulfstream jet this past quarter and ultimately decides it’s just “a fun stat”. The Macalope hears that Frommer is a hoot at parties.
Finally, there’s news that the iPhone has overtaken RIM and Microsoft in smart phone shipments The Macalope will not be detailing the number of clowns who scoffed at the idea of the iPhone ever making it as there is not enough space on the Internet.
You do know that an analyst is just an anal cyst without the 'c'.
This has happened before:
1 - The product code for an Apple device is announced to be discontinued (usually leaked via a vendor).
2 - Everyone assumes that device is being abandoned by Apple. There is much hysteria.
3 - Then it turns out that only THAT VERSION of the device is being discontinued... to make way for a newer, cooler version of the same device - a brand new version that has a brand new product code.
I don't know about you, but I'm keen to see how tiny they make the Mini this time. :o)
Hmmm. I'm holding out for a Mini the size of a short-stack of thumb drives for the price of OS X Snow Leopard. Just add a Hard Drive, a keyboard, mouse, and monitor, and you're a Mac Maniac.
I'd be happy if it ever happened that "good" and "delivered" were not mutually exclusive adjectives for "pizza."